Why on earth would I go to therapy anyway?
Hello!
Okay so it may go without saying that I am a huge advocate of accessing regular therapy. But I acknowledge that not everyone can do this. Due to privatisation, poor funding of mental health services and a lack of access to public mental health services for many people accessing regular therapy can be a privilege. So it may be that a person can only access therapy on a basis that fits with their financial needs, or they may choose to access low cost or free mental health services when available. I will talk about this in another blog, but for the time being this blog will cover what some if the benefits can be, by accessing regular therapy.
But nothing is broken
Often the view about therapy is that it is something to be accessed when there is an issue or problem or something that needs to change or be fixed. It is true that therapy can be really useful during times of crisis however for people considering making the investment in therapy, it is helpful to think about therapy in terms of being a form of mental health maintenance as well. I have put down some of the things that therapy can be great for and what I love about it, this is by no means an exhaustive list so please add to it.
Therapy as a sounding board
A really common experience is that a person can access therapy as a way of accessing support during a difficult experience or transition. It can be really beneficial to have a confidential space to do this, that is separate to anyone you know. This can help with feeling like the therapist is completely impartial. This is really different from chatting to a friend, who might know others involved in the situation and have their own opinion or agenda. Similarly in a therapeutic space there is no judgement, your therapist is there to help you reflect and explore and maybe implement some specific skills or strategies if you have asked for that. They are definitely not there to communicate in a way that makes you feel judged. If you do feel that way, it can be so important and lead to deep transformations if you can tell them about that and you can work through it together. But I will have more to say on being able to let your therapist know what is going on for you a bit later in the blog.
Therapy as a way to deepen our understanding of ourself
Therapy is a great way to help us understand ourselves better. We can use the therapeutic space to start to examine our way of being in the world. A person might notice a particular way of interacting, that shows up in therapy, that might help uncover the pattern. This can be why particular themes in regards to your own thoughts, feelings, nervous system states or behaviours about therapy can be so valuable and help you learn so much about yourself. When we learn about ourselves we can start to see how things play out in our way of being with ourself, others and the world. It is for this reason I would say that anything can be worth exploring in therapy, even if it seems insignificant.
Therapy can help an individual examine their beliefs and values and organise their thoughts. In this way we can start to understand on a deeper level what might drive some of our behaviour. Or in a simpler way, why we do what we do.
Therapy as a way to process things
Therapy can also be a really great space to reflect on our experiences and in doing so improve our understanding and develop a language for our experiences. We can also process some of the past events that have occurred, and in processing these we might discover how they are impacting on us in the present.
We can also use the space to help us make important decisions. And while it is unlikely that your therapist will make the decision for you, the therapeutic space can help you gain perspective and work through the decision. Additionally you can reflect on some of the drivers for our behaviour (remember those beliefs, values, thoughts, emotions that I mentioned earlier might drive our behaviour). By doing this we might see a pattern of how we respond to similar demands and with that knowledge we might chose to act differently this time. Of course, your therapist will likely help you see those patterns, as it can sometimes be really hard to see them ourself when we have been living with them for so long.
Therapy is a place to feel our feelings
This is a bit of a favourite one of mine, but therapy is a place where you have space to feel your feelings. How often in life do we have a space to freely share and then feel the feelings that may arise. This of course, is not an easy thing to do for everyone, but how it is to express your feelings might give you a lot of information too.
Therapy can promote safety, growth and development
Finally, one of the things I really value about therapy is having a space that feels safe, to grow and develop. We don’t often get to grow in a way that is paced for us, often development or growth can be based on the needs of our environment. So therapy is unique in that the growth is completely at your own pace and aligned with your authentic goals and values.
For anyone that is able to access therapy, keeping these things in mind can help you reframe why you might go to therapy rather than just viewing it as a thing to access when you are experiencing something difficult. Therapy can be something we do to maintain our mental health too. Sometimes therapy can feel pretty emotional and vulnerable and others times it can feel good. In the same way that we may nurture our physical health by eating well, going to see a doctor when we are sick or going to the gym, going to therapy regularly can help nurture our mental health.